Relationship Status

I often write about the Facebook as an insane addition to our social lives. It is our go to for current events more so than the actual news. It’s just faster. I heard that Amy Winehouse died on Facebook, not the TV.  I thoroughly enjoyed The Social Network as an inside look to its invention. One of my favorite parts is when our hero Mark has an epiphany about adding a Relationship Status to the profile. People want to know if someone is single or not and Facebook is a good place to go scope someone out.

Since its invention Facebook people have stalked their profiles to see what they’re all about. Not just people you want to bone but any random person. We can see which high school peers got fat, who likes the same lame ass shows as you, and who is has a better job than you. I find it amazing to see people’s personal drama all up on the Facebook. I see people fighting, breaking up, and getting back together again. Suddenly, something as private as the ups and downs of your love life are public knowledge… and perhaps we want it to be. If I’m dating someone and everyone knows about it, don’t I want everyone to know I’m single again? Hey guys I’m back on the market! Consequently, if I’m single and I am now “In a Relationship” I want everyone to rejoice in my happiness.

When we break up it is as breaking news on our newsfeed as the death of a celebrity. People comment, Like, and offer condolences. Our digital lives are just as important as our 3D ones. A relationship isn’t legal until it is “relationshipped” on Facebook, our digital minister. When we break up in life it even becomes more painful when you see it on Facebook, it becomes real. It’s more real because everyone and their mother knows of your failed relationship. Coworkers know, your friends, and your family. News travels faster than a high school locker room on Facebook.

I can go on typing about the Facebook endlessly but I think I’ll just stop here for now.

Flower Power

Last night I obsessed over two dying flowers in my house. It was after midnight and I saw the way the light was hitting the flowers and I just needed to photograph it. It’s kinda like how in As Good as it Gets the gay guy just had to paint her. It is beyond you, you are compelled to do it. If you don’t do it, it will upset you for a little.

As I posted the pics on Facebook I knew that they would receive a large response. Not because I’m cocky about the pics but because I know that people just LOVE flowers. It never gets old. Then you zoom in and take really macro pics and they become abstract so it’s just about the color, you can’t lose. Georgia O’Keeffe knew what she was doing. Flowers are still mildly erotic and the masses can generally agree to their appealing nature.

Murder at Sands Point

Until recently I had fond memories of Sands Point, located on the North Shore of the Island. I remember being a little girl there and it being a magical place. This past Easter Sunday my parents and I embarked on the journey to the North to see Sands Point. The ride was pleasant and as we got closer things looked familiar. I stepped out the car and it was beautiful. The grass was green the sky blue and the water sparkled.

I was deceived. As I got closer to the castle and the water I started being attacked by little bastard bugs. There were everywhere! I practically ran away screaming. There is nothing I loath more then a bunch of little fleas and gnats all up in my face, up my nose, in my mouth, my hair. It was awful. As I ran into the car I took about 5 of them with me and I squished them dead with sick pleasure. Die you bastards! I felt like they were crawling all over me hours later. Yuck!

Of course I seem to be the only one bothered by these flying shitheads, but I have proof of their numbers…

There are 18 bugs in this picture. Disgusting.

The Tourist

I really don’t know why this movie was so heavily shunned. The Tourist was an entertaining little movie and had two of my favorite actors in it. Angeline Jolie was absolutely breathtakingly stunning. The woman is aging beautifully. Her make up was done very tastefully and appropriate to her age. Her clothing was just delicious. The movie opened with her wearing this jacket/pancho thing and it complimented her cream colored dress. The gloves were a nice touch. I kept thinking of her Lara Croft character, in which she knows she’s awesome and we totally agree.

Johnny Depp on the other hand looked like shit. He was scruffy and actually little chubby in the face, but his performance made up for his looks. Johnny Depp acts as if he has an inside joke that his fans are all apart of because his acting invokes the spirt of past characters. Hunter S. Thompson is forever present in his mannerisms, Jack Sparro has permanently taken hold of his body, and the Mad Hatter comes through when he attempts an English accent.

Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp together felt slightly unnatural but the awkwardness worked with the story. Her “I’m beautiful and perfect” attitude and his stumbles and fumbles worked together to create the classic old movie feel to it. It was almost corny at points but I felt that if turned into Black and White the movie wouldn’t be any different from an oldie with its dramatic screenplay. The action was kept down a notch, something that let me focus on the characters more.

All in all, Angeline Jolie’s bewitching eyes kept mine glued to the screen and I couldn’t wait for what Johnny Depp was going to say next. There were even a couple of interesting twists in the movie to keep it from being overtly typical.

I think for people to like this movie they have to truly be fans of Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie, which I obviously am and if you’re not, then go watch something stupid with Will Ferrel in it (who I loath).

Easy Virture

Easy Virtue is not a new movie but I doubt many have seen it, which is a damn shame. This wonderful little movie is a hidden treasure. I feel like people may have stayed away because of Jessica Biel but she was actually amazing in it. I kept waiting for a reason to not like her but she was charming and funny, as was the entire movie.

Good music, witty humor, and  beautiful cinematography. I honestly have a smile on my face during the entire movie. Then there is Colin Firth who is as always acting perfection. I will see any movie Colin Firth is in.

This movie plays on Starz a lot so if you happen to come across it take a break from movies you have to be stoned for to enjoy.

Watch the Trailer : http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi4286186265/

Why help Japan?

I fully admit that I’m not the best person to talk politics or economics with. I don’t really watch the news, mainly because the people who are on the news annoy the shit out of me. I am really considering subscribing to the New York Times, but that’s another story.

I do however, check in on msnbc.com especialy during times like these. The tsunami disaster in Japan has been of major interest to me. I check the site daily for updates about the radiation and everything else. The most heartbreaking part of it are all the images. The photographs coming out of this are horrific and I nearly cry everyday looking at them. I feel so lucky and have NOTHING to complain about. It is truly a disaster for humankind.

Imagine your entire world literally turned up-side-down, washed away, and you have no place to live, nothing to eat, no where to go.

It has recently come to my attention that some people in America are asking why we should be helping these people in need… Um excuse me?  AS HUMANS WE HAVE AN OBLIGATION TO HELP OTHER HUMANS IN A TIME OF DISASTER! If we can help, we damn well should. It’s just the right thing to do. Even Poland sent firefighters!

As citizens of the world we should always help others in need. If you see a person fall on the street you should help them, not walk over them. If you have any doubts about helping Japan just look at some of the images that are coming out of there. Natural Disasters can happen anywhere at anytime. We don’t help others to get something in return. We help our fellow humans because it is the humane thing to do, despite things that have happened in the past.

Anyone who thinks differently really disappoints me as a human being.

For more images go to:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/42144324/displaymode/1247?beginSlide=1&beginTab=1/from/toolbar

My Digital Outrage About Planned Parenthood

I put off writing about the Planned Parenthood issue all day. I’m literally disgusted with it all.

I’ll begin with the obvious. They want to save money, but hello?!?! That means we’ll have more mothers who can’t afford it therefore they’ll be on welfare. What are we doing? Does thinking ahead, or the fucking long run mean nothing to anyone anymore?

Planned Parenthood is NOT JUST ABOUT ABORTIONS. Women can go there to get their annual pap smears. It is a routine check up that women need to get. Of course the people who are making these decisions are mostly men. They are not thinking about that at all. The men who are making these decisions are Old, White, Republicans, Prude, and obviously Stupid. When they hear Planned Parenthood they hear Abortion.

Need I mention that how expensive Birth Control is if you don’t have health insurance? Planned Parenthood charges like $15 per pack. Without Planned Parenthood you’ll have to pay A LOT more. So what, are couples who’ve been together for a while supposed to start using condoms? Who the fuck uses condoms when you’ve been in a relationship for a few months?!

I know we’re a society founded by Puritan Prudes but can we kick all the Old White Men out of the Senate? Lets not deny that these Men, who are so adamant about family values, are actually the ones fucking hookers on the side. What are they going to do when their hooker can’t afford birth control and  their perfect little family values go down the drain.

People have sex. They are doing it younger and younger. Whether they should or shouldn’t is another discussion. But now if you want to be safe about having sex it might be too expensive. And even condoms break.

Sorry but my vagina needs a little more attention and Planned Parenthood is a great place to get it.

Please Visit

http://www.ppaction.org/IStandWithPP 

and sign the open letter

Picture Perfect Memories

So as a photographer I am a big fan of taking pictures of everything. Sunsets, travel, the world, dogs… whatever. I photograph things that I find interesting and beautiful, like anyone else. With facebook being a part of everyday life we post our photographs daily of where we went, who we were with, and what we were doing. As I look at these endless photographs of people out at bars, restaurants, parties I can’t help but wonder, who are we trying to impress?

 ”Most of my friends spend more time uploading pictures on Facebook than they do actually living the scenes they’re capturing.” (Signe Markvard)

My friend Signe said this in a video almost 3 years ago but I was reminded of it again when I was at a Bar Mitzvah. I was watching all these people gather to take the typical photographs that you see at any event and I was thinking,  I bet these people can’t wait to get the photos on facebook so the world can comment on them. Its all about capturing the memories so we can prove to our FB friends that we are soooo fucking cool. Look how much fun we’re having!!!

I hear this phrase all the time, “Oh my gawd this pic is so cute, you have to put it on facebook!” Its like we go out just so we can look good and cool on our more important personas that live in a fucking computer. What happened to just having fun for funs sake?

The Death Of Photography

I am very serious about what I’m about to talk about. I think the future of photography is in serious trouble. While there is there an overwhelming amount of choice when it comes to cameras, there is one that is unfortunately the winner. That is the camera phone.

THE CAMERA PHONE IS NOT A SUITABLE CAMERA PEOPLE! Not even the best of the best like Iphones and Blackberrys. Using the camera that lives in your phone is a tragedy. Yes its very convenient and handy, but it looks like SHIT. People, you are ruining the memories of your children and dogs and that awesome snowstorm that just happened. Stop being a lazy ass and get yourself a camera and take some decent photos!

ALSO… YOUR CAMERA PHONE DOES NOT WORK IN DARK PLACES AND THE FLASH IT HAS LOOKS LIKE SHIT. I can’t tell you how tragic it is to see people try to use their camera phones in restaurants and then they look at it in confusion, its too dark!? Of course its too dark, the camera on your phone is not capable you ass. I see moms take pictures of their children with their camera phones and I feel sorry for them. You will not have the memories of your children being kids because there is a 3×3 tiny, blurry, dark picture on your phone.

Some people can actually get there pictures from their phones to their computers… and wow they even put them on facebook for the rest of the world to see. But the rest of the world does not care about your pictures. Sorry. These photographs are supposed to be for your own memories. Take your photographs with a normal camera and get your lazy ass to CVS and get them actually printed, and place them in a photo album, oh gawd how old fashioned.

But you wont do this. They will live in your computer or on your phone and then one day your computer will crash and your phone will get lost and all your photographs will be GONE. Bye bye memories of your children and your dog Fluffy who is no longer with us.

StumbleUpon

If you haven’t heard of Stumble you are seriously missing out. I thought stumbling was common knowledge but I’ve spoken to way to many people who have yet to experience the Internet through StumbleUpon.

Do you often get bored online? Are your Facebook friends not entertaining you? Do you feel like you have this thing called the Internet that you don’t take advantage of because you suck at surfing the web? Then Stumble is what you need!

All it is, is a button that you click over and over again and it takes you all over the Internet! Comics, videos, historical facts, beautiful photography, art, recipes, Wikipedia, games, and all the other useless but fun shit the internet has to offer. You can Like or Dislike things and customize it so it only takes you places that interest you. Its awesome! You can stumble for hours and learn and laugh and share things with your friend through email, Facebook, or even twitter.

You can download a toolbar which I recommend, or have a temporary toolbar pop up that will go away once to leave the page.

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/

Prepare to be blown away! and thank you Vanessa Condy and Will Clune for introducing me to stumble like 3 years ago.